Spiritual Direction: Knowing the Path of Your Soul
An interview with Joan Borysenko, Ph.D.
by Raz Ingrasci, President (Edited
by Ellie Weiser)
Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., is chairperson of the Hoffman Institute
Advisory Council. She is a leading expert on stress, spirituality, and the
mind/body connection. She has a doctorate in medical sciences from
Harvard Medical School, and is a licensed psychologist. She is the
author of 12 best-selling books, an outstanding workshop leader, and
a frequent guest on national TV and radio shows. Dr. Borysenko recently
spoke with Hoffman President Raz Ingrasci.
Raz: Joan, you hold the Hoffman Process in high
regard as a mind/body healing program, and a couple of years ago
you founded the Claritas Institute for Interspiritual Inquiry. What’s
its purpose and what is the connection between the Claritas work
and the work at the Process?
 Joan:
The two programs are complimentary. Claritas is the Latin word for
“clarity” or “illumination.” We use it to
describe the state of transparency in which the ego is set aside
and the inner Light is revealed. Then the universal flow can reveal
itself as spiritual guidance, because we’re free to perceive
it. The Process helps a person attain that state of interior freedom,
where you can be present to what is without the attachment and desire
that habitually obscure inner clarity. The innate Light we each
discover in the Process is the same thing we try to bring forth
in Claritas.
At the Claritas Institute, people train to become spiritual companions.
Many spiritual traditions share the notion of walking the spiritual
journey, which is very much a mystery, with a spiritual companion.
Raz: So it requires that a person have complete
openness to where the spiritual path leads.
Joan: Father Thomas Keating said, “This
is a journey into the unknown. So if you think you know where you’re
going, you’re on the wrong road.”
When you’re in the present moment — when you don’t
know what will happen but are willing to stay with the path as it
unfolds — you connect to a larger reality. That’s when
joy, compassion, and an authentic sense of purpose spontaneously
arise as guidance from the Spiritual Self. This journey home to
true nature erodes narcissism through the recognition that we’re
all interconnected. The exquisite tenderness of heart, and the willingness
to help others that results, is absolutely revolutionary.
Raz: So a spiritual mentor helps another person
know themselves in a way that they can’t normally —
from within, by reflecting back to that person their own inner journey
toward the Light?
Joan: That’s exactly right. And what they
reflect back is essence or true nature, and the movement of spirit
in their life. Rather than mirroring back the ego’s story,
the art comes in learning how to mirror back the soul’s story
— to light up the inner meaning of daily experience that’s
often hidden. This process has been called tuning in to the “vector
of love” — the ultimate reality behind appearances.
Raz: How is spiritual mentoring different from
counseling with a member of the clergy?
Joan: It’s not problem oriented, it’s
oriented toward the movement of spirit, toward the emergence of
essence. You can think of it as two people listening for the presence
of a third.
Raz: Is it based on specific religions, traditions,
cultures, or faiths?
Joan: We are the Claritas Institute for Interspiritual
Inquiry because we’re interested in interspirituality, a term
coined by the late Brother Wayne Teasdale. Wayne was both a Catholic
and a Hindu sannyasin who was interested in the deepest level of
interfaith conversation — in learning to respect the differences
between traditions while simultaneously orienting toward the essential
spirituality they share. It’s like the parable of blind men
describing an elephant when each is holding a different part. The
trunk is as real as the tail, but when you open your “inner
eye,” it’s clear that you’re describing parts
of the same larger whole.
Raz: Beautiful.
Joan: So if you’re a Sufi and I’m
a Jew and we share the moment when we’re deeply connected
to the source of being, then we would absolutely understand one
another. Maybe some of our terminology would be different but we
would know we were standing in the same mystic heart.
Raz: So you’re looking at the mystical
or spiritual core of Hinduism, of Christianity, of Judaism, or Buddhism,
and you’re seeing where we find each other in them.
Joan: That’s right. Religious differences
continue to cause problems throughout the world, but Wayne Teasdale
believed that in order for us to reach a higher order, we have to
understand our deeper commonalities and find the mystic heart that
we all share.
Raz: At the Process we learn that every person
has a spiritual self and whether male, female, old, young, rich,
poor, whatever, the external differences are just that, external.
The Process lets people discern between the false self and the true
self, and once you’ve found that deeper self there’s
a way to live in it and be present for others.
Joan: Also, what’s important is that the
Process lets people know their false self better. Not only do you
get to know your true essence, but you see patterns that are mistaken
for who you truly are. The knowledge of both of those is crucial.
Raz: Some people view spirituality as something
that takes us away from life because they view it as being “out
there,” but you’re talking about a practical spirituality
that connects you more to life, into a greater awareness of self
and others.
Joan: Yes, absolutely.
Raz: I assume that a prerequisite for doing the
work at Claritas is that a person must understand what compassion
is and have opened their heart in certain fundamental ways.
We have a wonderful Hoffman teacher, Ginger Buckley, who’s
been a Claritas student for 18 months in your Spiritual Mentoring
Program. She said that she’s come to see that one of the ways
to peace is through recognizing the spiritual traditions of others.
She considers the spiritual mentoring program as her own practical
step toward furthering peace in the world. That seems so right,
because when my intellect, emotions, body, and spiritual self are
connected, I am whole. Dwelling in my wholeness, I‘m more
trustworthy, more confident, less arrogant, more compassionate,
and much more willing to see and admit a mistake. When I’m
in my spirit I’m moving toward something that’s connecting
me more to other people and I value that connection tremendously.
Joan: Absolutely! That was an excellent description
of spirituality. When we are interested in creating the space for
deep listening — deep understanding among people — out
of that, right action emerges.
Raz: When you listen deeply, the most practical
methods for resolution come about. When we come in with a preconception
of another person or a group, we try to impose our ideas on them.
But you’re talking about an intimate connection with life
that’s always surprising.
Joan: And new! Life feels alive and interesting
because we’re open to the possibility and wisdom that unfolds
when we’re present with others in this way. This is what humility
is, that kind of openness and fascination with life and desire to
listen deeply.
Raz: It’s what allows us to both recognize
cultural differences and find what‘s common among us. When
you get to the core, the experience turns out to be the same. We
have to be able to find the truth in the metaphors instead of trying
to make the metaphors factual. And when we do that, we find that
we are all deeply connected.
Joan: Yes. One of the things that characterizes
the Hoffman Process is the feeling that somebody’s listening
to me, respecting me, seeing me at my core. When that happens, defenses
fall and people enter their hearts and they look at the other people
and think, “My goodness, wouldn’t it be amazing if we
could sit down with ordinary people, from different countries that
may not be in agreement, and simply get to speak about what’s
most important to us and just listen to each other?” I truly
believe that ideas would emerge that we could not have thought of,
any of us, alone.
Raz: Joan, I love where you’re going with
your Spiritual Mentoring Program because it seems to be an extension
for a number of people who’ve done the Process — people
who want to more closely discern and follow their spiritual intuition,
their spiritual self. It’s a big step for you to say to people,
“I’m going to help you do this.”
Joan: It’s probably the biggest commitment
I’ve ever made — a calling in the classic sense. And
it’s been humbling — a recognition that when you answer
the call of your spiritual self, something larger works through
you. We’re having a great deal of fun in the midst of it,
which tells me that we’re on the right track!
Raz: Please tell us more about the program.
Joan: There are three parts — the first
is about our own personal inquiry, what aligns us to the source
of being, what it means to be present, and what gets in the way.
The second part of the program concerns discernment: How do we know
when it’s our ego and when it’s our spiritual self directing
our choices? The third concerns engaged spirituality — how
we bring our full humanity to the world.
Our students are getting in-depth training in how to be spiritual
guides or mentors by participating in their own spiritual mentoring
process; and then, during the last year of the program, by mentoring
others. While that’s scary at first, learning to step aside
and let spirit direct the process is positively exhilarating, extraordinary
to watch.
Directing this program and seeing the transformations in our students
— and myself — has been the greatest privilege I’ve
ever had. And because Claritas is an ongoing community of inquiry
and practice, we get to continue the journey together after each
class graduates. I’m just loving this interfaith, interspiritual
community.
Raz: We need more of that in the world. So many
people get isolated in their own religious tradition that they believe,
whether publicly or secretly, that theirs is the one that will triumph
over all others. Instead, we can find a way not simply to tolerate
others but to celebrate all paths to God.
Joan: It’s fun to learn the language of
other traditions and to begin to say, “Oh, they’re talking
about the same thing but in just a different language, from a different
culture.” I realized that if you’re willing to listen
to the other’s language, you get to the place beneath language,
when it’s so clear that we’re standing on exactly the
same ground, talking about exactly the same thing. The only thing
that varies, really, is the language and that we tend to ask ourselves,
“What could be more different than a Buddhist and a Catholic?”
Raz: When we’re talking about language,
we’re using the word metaphorically. It’s not literally
French or English or German, it’s that each religion is a
language for talking about mystical and spiritual experiences. And
so as you explore those different languages you find that they all
elaborate the same profoundly human experiences.
Joan: Two “hot” areas being explored
in the area of mind/body research around essential spirituality
is the power of both gratitude and forgiveness. Whatever the tradition,
we can all agree that there’s a fundamental shift in perception
when you’re grateful, and that forgiveness is perhaps the
most radical of all spiritual teachings because through it we develop
empathy and compassion and bring forth a different way of seeing
the world. And of course it sets the forgiver free. The Process
is a great place to learn that because you come to this essential
forgiveness with your family of origin.
Raz: That’s absolutely true.
To change course for a minute — you’ve written 12
books, many of them are best sellers. Are there plans for another
one?
Joan: My husband, Gordon Dveirin, and I are writing
a book called The Golden Compass, about spiritual guidance. It will
be out in October.
Raz: What’s its premise?
Joan: For the book, we interviewed 27 spiritual
leaders including Rabbis, Priests, Sufi’s, Buddhists, Hindus,
Shamans, and Quakers. And we asked this amazing panel of spiritual
friends 12 questions about spiritual guidance: What blocks it? What
encourages our openness to it? What is the role of community? Do
they think that our earth globally is evolving? Are we evolving
towards something good? One of the most fun questions we pose is,
“If given the chance, what would you tell world leaders?”
I think it’s going to be quite a delightful book that looks
at the nature of how do we find our direction in this world in a
way that helps us to contribute to the world becoming a better place
and human beings becoming more fully human.
Raz: It sounds fascinating. And from my perspective,
evolutionary.
Joan: Yes, we’re evolving, we truly are,
and that’s an important thing to know — really know
— when the news in the world is bad. Don’t give up heart.
Out of the chaos something more compassionate, coherent, and harmonious
can arise if we all do our individual parts.
Raz: Thank you, Joan. We’ll look for your
book in October, and I speak for the entire Hoffman community when
I say that you and your work, and your contributions to making the
world a better place, continue to inspire us and make us proud.
Joan: Thank you!
For more information on the Claritas Institute Interspiritual
Mentor Training Program, please visit www.Claritasinstitute.com
or call 303/440-8460.ø |
